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Official grade slip

Ranked #231 of 583 on X

Doomscroll District School

reportcard.lol · SEMESTER: Fall 2026

STUDENT@thomaskanze
HOMEROOMThe Open Mic
SUBJECTGRADE
Original PostsD
RagebaitD
SincerityA
ShitpostingC
Not a RobotA
YapperF
SUMMER SCHOOL
GRADE POINT AVERAGE3.22/ 4.30
TEACHER'S COMMENT

"Borrows formats the way a cover band borrows songs. Faithful, but the originals exist."

F in Yapper means they say it and stop.

Enrolled in the shitposting seminar. Attendance is the only requirement.

Summer school recommended. Fewer opinions, more drafts.

PARENT SIGNATURE
FILE UNDER: POSTING HABITSX · reportcard.lol

@thomaskanze on X: GPA 3.22 out of 4.30, summer school. Best subject Sincerity (A), weakest Original Posts (D). Teacher's comment: "Borrows formats the way a cover band borrows songs. Faithful, but the originals exist.".

Captionwww.reportcard.lol/r/x/thomaskanze?v=mukrc9c2

Sign the slip if you like. The signature stays on this device.

Grade another handle

How grading works

Your grades measure how your posts read, not how popular they are. A high follower count doesn't help you here.

What counts: saying something specific instead of vague, making a point that isn't restated common knowledge, sounding like a real person, and being at least a little funny.

What doesn't count: follower numbers, likes, how many replies you get. The grade is about what you say when you do post.