Official grade slip

Ranked #225 of 361 on X

Doomscroll District School

reportcard.lol · SEMESTER: Fall 2026

STUDENT@spiderslim

HOMEROOMThe Open Mic

SUBJECTGRADE

Original PostsD

RagebaitD

SincerityA+

ShitpostingB

Not a RobotA+

YapperF

SUMMER SCHOOL

GRADE POINT AVERAGE3.48/ 4.30

TEACHER'S COMMENT

"The algorithm is providing the ideas and the account is providing the button clicks."

F in Yapper means they say it and stop.

Placed in the bit development class. The ideas need a room to breathe.

Summer school recommended. Fewer opinions, more drafts.

PARENT SIGNATURE

Captionjust got my report card and it says: sincere student. what does yours say?reportcard.lol/r/x/spiderslim

Sign the slip if you like. The signature stays on this device.

Grade another handle

How grading works

Your grades measure how your posts read, not how popular they are. A high follower count doesn't help you here.

What counts: saying something specific instead of vague, making a point that isn't restated common knowledge, sounding like a real person, and being at least a little funny.

What doesn't count: follower numbers, likes, how many replies you get. The grade is about what you say when you do post.