reportcard.lol · SEMESTER: Fall 2026
"Reads like a human wrote it while thinking about something else. The best kind."
Placed in the open-mic classroom. Please come prepared.
Assigned to summer school. There is significant room for improvement.
@kurt on X: GPA 3.72 out of 4.30, summer school. Best subject Not a Robot (A+), weakest Sincerity (B). Teacher's comment: "Reads like a human wrote it while thinking about something else. The best kind.".
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Sign the slip if you like. The signature stays on this device.
Your grades measure how your posts read, not how popular they are. A high follower count doesn't help you here.
What counts: saying something specific instead of vague, making a point that isn't restated common knowledge, sounding like a real person, and being at least a little funny.
What doesn't count: follower numbers, likes, how many replies you get. The grade is about what you say when you do post.
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