Official grade slip

Ranked #36 of 36 on Threads

Doomscroll District School

reportcard.lol · SEMESTER: Fall 2026

STUDENT@spotify

HOMEROOMThe Control Room

SUBJECTGRADE

Original PostsD

Emoji RestraintB

RagebaitINC^*

SincerityD

ShitpostingD

AttendanceA

SUMMER SCHOOL

GRADE POINT AVERAGE2.00/ 4.30

TEACHER'S COMMENT

"Posts from a distinct point of view. Not borrowed, not rephrased."

* Ragebait: INC. Not enough posts to read the bait pattern.

Assigned to the optimization wing. The teacher follows the numbers.

Assigned to summer school. There is significant room for improvement.

PARENT SIGNATURE

Caption"Posts from a distinct point of view. Not borrowed, not rephrased." my report card came in. what does yours say?reportcard.lol/r/threads/spotify

Sign the slip if you like. The signature stays on this device.

Grade another handle

How grading works

Your grades measure how your posts read, not how popular they are. A high follower count doesn't help you here.

What counts: saying something specific instead of vague, making a point that isn't restated common knowledge, sounding like a real person, and being at least a little funny.

What doesn't count: follower numbers, likes, how many replies you get. The grade is about what you say when you do post.