Official grade slip

No. 001 / Fall term

Doomscroll District School

reportcard.lol · SEMESTER: Fall 2026

STUDENTJeff Weiner (jeffweiner08)

HOMEROOMContent Curation

SUBJECTGRADE

Honest TitlesA+

Plain EnglishA+

ModestyA+

ReferencesA+

AttendanceINC^*

Keeping It ShortD

SUMMER SCHOOL

GRADE POINT AVERAGE3.64/ 4.30

TEACHER'S COMMENT

"The about section is as long as the entire employment history section. A notable ratio."

* Attendance: Insufficient data. Not enough roles with clear durations to grade.

Placed in content curation. Original material is optional but encouraged.

Summer school. Several sections need a rewrite and one needs a delete.

PARENT SIGNATURE

Captionjust got my linkedin report card and it says: speaks human. what does yours say?reportcard.lol/r/linkedin/jeffweiner08

Sign the slip if you like. The signature stays on this device.

Grade another handle

How grading works

Your grades measure how your LinkedIn profile reads, not how many connections you have.

What counts: job titles that match the work, plain language without corporate jargon, achievements stated without the humblebrag wrapper, recommendations that sound like real people, showing up for a while, and keeping the about section readable.

What doesn't count: connection count, follower numbers, or which companies you've worked at. The grade is about how the profile reads.